Key West Bi Plane, The Shot Doctor Bar Crawl, Key West Poker Run

Key West Blues by Key West Chris Rehm


^ Listen to Key West Blues while you enjoy the Blog!^

KEY WEST BI PLANE FLIGHT, SHOT DOCTOR SCOTT ALAN, & KEY WEST POKER RUN

So, there I was, just doing some things around my place when I get a text from Trop Rock artist Scott Alan, also known as The Shot Doctor, for that marvelous apparatus he invented, of the same name. I knew that Dr. Scott Alan was coming to town on a promotional/charitable event he was involved with, which happened to be a bar crawl. We had talked about it several times in the previous weeks. It was also a benefit for Naval air families stationed in the area. Of course Key West is home to the Key West Naval Air Station, something all Key Westers are very proud of. For me it hits close to home as the Truman Annex living quarters for the service men and women, is just a couple of blocks away from home for me, being located right next to the Southernmost Point.

I look at the text from Scott and it says “Can you fly at one today? Open Cockpit” Hummm… Fly? Is this a vernacular for go out and plow a few down, perhaps in an open air bar? It’s 11 am. I reply “Fly?” I ask. "In the bi plane" comes his reply. What a treat! I met Dr. Shot Alan… er, Dr. Scott Alan at the airport and we went over to Key West Bi Planes where we met Col. Ray Cunanas, son of Key West stunt pilot legend Gen. Fred Cubanas. It should be noted that all of the planes that Fred Cubanas owns, are members of the Conch Republic Air Force.

Col. Ray Cubanas was extremely pleasant and professional. He is also the main pilot for the bi plane rides. I found Ray has the ability to explain everything with an air of freshness to it. Remarkable considering he does this many times a day. He’s clearly someone who loves what he does. The aircraft is in pristine condition and is a 1942 Waco bi-plane. After some picture taking on the ground Scott and I buckled into the front seat and Col. Ray in the rear. He fires up the nine cylinder, air cooled radial engine and what a great sound! We taxi down the airport and then off we go, Up! Up! And Away!!!

All I can say was that the ride was fantastic! We flew down the southern coast of the island and then followed the shore around to the north side passing Ft. Zach and the Truman Waterfront. Over the water on the north side Col. Cabanas took us over the water. What a sight! The water in the Keys is magnificent with so many shades of blue and green. This is undoubtedly the way to see it, bar none! We also flew over down town as well. If you come to Key West, this is a MUST! We also opted for the optional DVD of our flight, which is from two video cams, mounted on the aircraft itself. Our flight was 25 minutes. They also have longer excursions available. It’s a short part of your stay, however the memories will last a lifetime.
For more info check out their website:
http://www.keywestbiplanes.com/

As I said, The Shot Doctor, Scott Alan, was in town doing a pub crawl. Now, bear in mind, Scott is a master musician first and foremost. He is a Berkley graduate and back when others were picking up a guitar and learning to strum Margaritaville or, Brown Eyed Girl, Scott was doing arrangements for big band jazz ensembles. Heavy stuff indeed. Scott also came up with his Shot Doctor and often does promotions. This crawl started at The Cork And Stogie, a fantastic little Mom and Pop cigar, beer, and wine establishment on the 1200 block of Duval. From there Scott and his entourage headed over to The Rum Bar in the next block. I met up with the traveling circus at a new bar, Overboard on the 700 blockof Duval. My friends Rick and Cindy Hogan arranged for Dr. Alan to have an I.V. stand, which he hung plasma bags filled with a green elixir. Dr. Alan, along with three quite attractive assistants, administered the potion from the plasma bags into everyone’s Shot Doctors. A great time was had by all and the tour continued to Willi T’s, where Key West icon Barry Cuda was playing, and from there on to Krawls off Duval. Trust me, anyone with a sense of humor and an easy laugh, will LOVE the Shot Doctor!
“Is there a doctor in the house”?
Check out his sites!
http://www.shotdoctorworld.com/
http://www.theislanddoctor.com/

This week was also the Key West Poker Run. I missed the actual year for the event this was, however it’s got to be pushing forty. The sponsor of the event Phil Peterson’s Harley Davidson up in Cutler Bay and Miami, started his business right here in Key West back in the fifties. The Poker Run starts there and runs to Key West. The event usually brings in close to 20,000 bikers and the town is always glad to see them. These guys are not afraid to spend money at art galleries, jewelry stores, in addition to the usual bars and guest houses. In addition, they are good tippers, from what I’ve been told from my friends in the service industry.

This Saturday I’ll be part of a new event “ The Key West Musicians Festival” at Smokin Tuna. Lots of folks playing too. If you’re in town, stop by! If not, you can always tune in to their live streaming video cam. I am currently scheduled to go on at 1pm. It looks like I’ll also have my friend Deb Hudson helping me out on a few songs as well! Whippeee!!!!!

http://keywestchris.com/

The Porch & Beer, Smokin Tuna & Music

My Little Island Town by Key West Chris Rehm

^ Click to hear "My Little Island Town" while you read the Blog!^

A very interesting thing started in Key West just over a year ago. The Porch opened on the corner of Caroline St. and Duval, across Caroline from The Bull, in the gorgeous Porter Mansion. One of the owners and publican is Chris Shultz, well known co-author of the bible for anyone even contemplating of moving to Key West, “Quit Your Job And Move To Key West”. The Porch is much more along the lines of a pub, than a bar, per say, but call it what you will. It’s warm and homey,only has one TV (thank God!) and resides within its stately surroundings inside the Porter Mansion. The Porter Mansion dates back to 1838, according to Dave, who was sitting next to me and lives upstairs, so he should know. And yes, you can take your libation out to the large veranda that is in front of the estate and have a seat and enjoy it in classic fashion.

What The Porch is, to be more specific, is an establishment that focuses mainly on, what we call today, Craft Beer. They also have a splendid wine selection that lines the entire wall of their adjacent sitting room. The really curious thing is that they always have a very knowledgeable clientele on hand. Many are locals and many more are visitors to Key West, from all over the globe, who didn’t just stumble across The Porch by accident. These people heard about it and searched it out. Personally, I find this remarkable for such a quaint little place, that only opened in July, 2010! They usually have roughly a dozen or so, craft brews on draft. How many they have in bottles, I’m not even going to guess, suffice to say it’s extraordinary. There is a chalkboard behind the bar that is jam packed with beers on hand, both from the U.S. and around the world. Bear in mind, this is Key West. We’re on the outer fringes. We’re talking the end of the line. It’s one hundred and six miles to get back to the mainland and almost one hundred and thirty to get to civilization, in the form of Florida City’s Last Chance Saloon.

Getting all of this rare beer here must have involved a lot of time and effort in logistics, which can’t be overlooked as well. Hats off to Mr. Shultz, his partners, and the distributors. The staff is exceptional as well. Very knowledgeable and well educated on the products they handle. Equally as important, it’s a fun crew setting a great atmosphere in a great place.

Here is the fascinating thing that seems to be somewhat of a byproduct of The Porch’s success. First off, the owners of The Porch have started looking into the Waterfront Market, with the intention of turning the Wyland painted building into a brew pub. Naturally, there are a lot of hurdles to clear, however it’s progressing as expected. Next, there is Krawl Off Duval, which opened a little over month ago. This is on Southard St., just a few doors east off Duval, as the name implies. Like The Porch, Krawl Off Duval focuses on craft beer. As I understand it, they are hoping to have a large selection of draft beers in the near future.

Also in the works are two more brew pubs, one on North Roosevelt and another on Eaton St. I don’t think these are too far off either. The town’s main home brewer, Jim Brady also mentioned on a KONKAM radio interview that he’s purchasing some beer equipment over on the west coast of Florida. There’s also talk of yet another craft beer establishment opening somewhere around the 600 block off Duval.

It should also be stated that Kelly’s Caribbean Restaurant has been brewing their own beer at their restaurant for at least a dozen years. Frankly however, they’ve always focused on their establishment as a restaurant, more so than a brew pub. Their beer was lacking, in my opinion, however they now have a new brewer there, so I’ll have to stop by again.

In the past, of course Key West had the Key West Brewery, which produced the famous Key West Sunset Ale and the beautiful Sunset Wheat. The brewing company closed its doors years ago, however the Melbourne Brewing Company continues brewing their beers about 330 miles north of Key West. There also used to be a brew pub on the two hundred block of Duval. However that ceased being a brew pub at least ten years ago.
However, the bottom line here is that Key West, like a wild fire, is very rapidly becoming a high quality brew town and unquestionably, The Porch has spearheaded this movement. Hats off to them!

On the musical front, Smokin Tuna is hoppin’! The bar opened a couple of months ago in the former El Alamo location, run and co-owned by former Hogsbreath manager Charlie Bauer. Charlie was there for nearly twenty years and the Hogsbreath has the most live music in town, running from noon until two am seven days a week. Rome wasn’t built in a day, but Smokin Tuna is stretching its legs bit by bit. They’ve had a good assortment of quality music acts there thus far, in the pm hours. I was fortunate enough to be invited up to play at Gary Hempsey’s birthday celebration to do a fun version of the Neville Brother’s tune “Yellow Moon”. Thank you Gary!

My friend and a major musical supporter in town, Steve Mellette, also invited me to play there on Saturday, September 24th, for the Key West Musician’s Festival. A fabulous assortment of players will be there including Bill Blue, Chris Cook, Chief Billy, Cory Hayden, Ericson Holt, George Victory, Kenny Fradley, plus a bunch more including the fabulous Deb Hudson and Joel Nelson, who both were kind enough to share their incredible talents on my new CD “Shanghai’d and Marooned in Key West (things could be worse)”. Many thanks to the Smokin Tuna and Charlie Bauer for hosting and Singing Iguana Productions for putting it together! 20% of the proceeds also go to the Sister Season Fund. Smokin Tuna is directly up the street across from Irish Keven's, at 4 Charles St. Saturday, September 24th Noon to Six PM.

This Isn't The Real World

Well, Labor Day Weekend is upon us. I recall up in the United States the common belief is Summer starts on Memorial day and finishes up on Labor Day. Perhaps the biggest reason I live here is my way of flipping my nose at that philosophy. My late cousin Joe Connolly used to say "There's no reason whatsoever to live in a clod climate!" and I believe he was right! So, here I am in the American Tropics, Key West.

Walking the dogs today I stopped by The Bottle Cap Lounge liquor store, outside the bar. They're great lovers of dogs there and always have treats for the dogs at the walk up window. Chuck was there and we shot the breeze while Tooloulou and Cajun enjoyed a biscuit. While chatting, Chuck used a phrase that a very sage and respected friend, Richard Van Der Mude has used from time to time when describing Key West and the Conch Republic as a whole. When talking about why we live here, he explained "This is not the real world".

A more true statement couldn't have been made. This is a main reason that when visitors come, after they leave, they have to come back. This is why those of us who live here, likewise feel the invisible magnetic draw to return as soon as possible.

I wouldn't dream of arguing that places such as The Grand Canyon, or NYC, or Cape Cod, The Great Lakes, Texas, California.. I could go on, but I wouldn't argue that any of these places are just wonderful places. However, they are The Real World and that's perhaps the most rudimentary difference between Key West and everywhere else. Living in the Conch Republic is almost akin to living in some sort of cartoon world. Yes, the laws of physics still apply here. If someone visiting gets so drunk that they fall down face first on the concrete, they're going to get hurt. The hospital here actually opens up an entire wing for tourist season. Likewise, if a group of visiting tourists rent a fleet of scooters and ride down the street all grinning like Alfred E. Newman honking their horns, guess what? They are still a bunch of jackasses.

However, down here is still a completely different mentality than anywhere else, not only in the U.S., but in the world. People realize it as well. Everyone's mindset changes when they get to the Keys. More time than not, they subconsciously realize that they are no longer in the real world. This is why everyone wants to come back, because this is not the Real World.


A great surprise this month over at The Key West Bait Shop's Live Bait Lounge this month. Every month they have their Beer of The Month and this month they featured "Casa Beer" from Casablanca, Morocco. As the sporting sort, I gave it a try, expecting it to fall on the 3, maybe 4 range of the 1- 10 scale. Surprise! Easily a 7+ and a perfect beer for a hot, summer day. Absolutely stunning label as well. Bottle and label rating is a solid 10. It's absolutely stunning, emitting style and design that captures it's origin perfectly. The Key West Bait and Tackle is located right at Land's End, which also hosts Turtle Kraals and The Raw Bar. Proprietors Chris or Joe are always there and Beccy is usually behind the bar. Stop by for a beer! ... Oh, they have all of your fishing requirements too! :-)

New Stuff!

Well, well, well... been too long! I guess I've been busy! Or a bit indolent.. at least as far as the blog goes, so my apologies. Lets see going over everything in these last months would just take way, way too long! But here are the high lights!

The CD/Album is finished, out and available! Available through me, or CD Baby, itunes, or CD Universe. The CD's name is "Shanghai'd and Marooned in Key West (things could be worse)" . You can look it up under that name, or just put in "Key West Chris", that's a lot quicker and easier. Eighteen of Key West's finest musicians kicking ass on ten songs!

Also!!! Website is up as of TODAY!!! Still growing, but we are blazing new trails in CD/Albums and Websites that have never been done before. Check it out! We still have loads of room to grow and expand too!

http://keywestchris.com/

Conch Rock also now has an insignia,which you would have noticed at the top of the page, done by local artist Abigail White, plus we have a back up by Artist Koz.

Off to bed now, but soon to follow in a couple of days with more exciting happenings from Key West!!

Key West and Havana, Cuba

Back around 1994 I's say, I was living in Miami and read a fascinating story in New Times, about a sailboat, I believe it was, that would take passengers from Key West, to Marina Hemingway, in Havana, Cuba. I found this incredible and went so far as to mail the article to a friend of mine who had a 38ft. sailboat, suggesting he do it to. My friend, Rick, thought I was daft, regretfully and never took me up on the idea. More regretful than that, was that I never pulled the trigger myself and came down to Key West to cruise, if I could, even in steerage if need be and see the forbidden isle of tobacco, sugarcane, and my all-time favorite, all things Hemingway. When I finally did move here I searched it out, but apparently it fell by the wayside/quayside somewhere in between.

I posted an old picture postcard from the Sloppy Joe’s Bar in Havana (This is the bar that Joe Russell named his bar after in Key West) on my facebook page and learned quite a bit more, thanks to replies by Bill Blue and underlined by Pati Crimmons, there were also Key West – Havana fishing tournaments, as well as a sailboat race. In my foggy memory of the New Times piece from the mid-nineties, I’m thinking that the sailboat race may have spawned the idea for the passenger sails. It rings a vague bell. Bill mentioned that his friend won it one year and the dolphin he caught hangs at Sloppy Joe’s bar. Both the sailboat race and the fishing tournament have since also fallen by the wayside/quayside as well.

The thing that started all of this posting was a conversation with my friend Mike Del Portillo, who lives in Texas, but was born and raised in Miami, albeit conceived in Cuba. He sent me an e-mail about an enterprise resort he wanted to start in a Free Cuba. That’s what harvested the old memories of the New Times piece. Then, by funny chance, the very next day I stumble across a piece about President Obama relaxing a couple of regulations regarding Americans traveling to Cuba. Nothing major, mind you, but a step in the right direction, in my opinion. The new rules allow students and religious groups to visit Cuba.

Well, all of this got the grey matter churning. Here we are, while it’s still bubbling away and far from a complete idea, this is what I’ve come up with thus far. The sailboat race is educational for many on board. A trip to Cuba is educational for any American on board, therefore, all classify as “Students”. In addition, if Scientology can actually get away with passing itself off as a religion in the eyes of the IRS, a government institution if there ever was one, can’t fishing do likewise? If you have any doubts, just listen to The Conch Republic’s own Mike McCloud and his song “Fishing Fool” and any argument against it will quickly be put to rest.

So, we re-instate both the fishing tournament and the sailboat race as a start. Perhaps a Hemingway tour can be added in the near future as well? After all, companies from The United States of America recently restored Ernest Hemingway’s boat, Pilar and also his home in Cojimar, just outside of Havana, Finca Vigia. Additionally, what would a Hemingway trip to Cuba be without a stop or few to La Floridita Bar? This was his favorite hangout and also where the Daiquiri was invented. The last I heard, the Sloppy Joe’s in Havana was being restored, so naturally that would be part of the educational student tour as well.
In times like these we also will require alternative methods to facilitate the modus operandi. My suggestion is that all traveling to Cuba, at this time, can only do so through the Conch Republic. In leaving from the Conch Republic, all traveling must have an official Conch Republic passport that must be stamped and logged by U.S. Immigration on both departure and return. A US passport must also be carried, however it will not be stamped by either US or Cuban immigration. All people traveling on these trips must be US Citizens. http://conchrepublic.com/



This is where we are at the moment. Any suggestions please e-mail to:

keywesthavana@gmail.com

Key West - The Language

Key West - The Language

Everyone knows that Key West is 90 miles north of Havana. I’m reminded every day when I leave my home, as the famous Southernmost Marker Buoy, on Whitehead and South St., is directly in my view. A lot of people express surprise when they hear it’s 160 miles from Key West to Miami. It’s a lot farther to Miami than Havana from here. The reality is, Key West is closer to Havana then it is to even Key Largo! Now, anyone going to Havana naturally expects Spanish to be spoken, as that’s the tongue of Cuba. I often hear surprise from visitors to Key West expressing dismay, when they tell me that on their way here, workers at Miami International Airport they encountered, didn’t even speak English.
Here in Key West, right in between Spanish speaking Miami and Spanish speaking Havana, we have an odd scenario. Like Miami, we have, and always had throughout history, a great influence from the island of sugarcane, tobacco, and rum, ninety miles south of us. Cubans have been coming here since the beginning. For many years prior to the American government procuring it from Spain, many Cubans just considered it a Cuban island. So, it goes without saying, you will hear Spanish spoken in Key West.
However, unlike our neighbor to the north, Miami, which has been populated over the last 50+ years by Latin Americans from every Spanish and Portuguese speaking country in the hemisphere, Key West’s immigrants are a whole different kettle of fish altogether.
We have a very large amount of people living and working in Key West, from Eastern Europe. Czechs, Russians, Poles, Hungarians, Slovaks, Ukrainians, Uzbeks, Croatians, Slovinians… the list of Slavs (Hungarians excluded, as they’re not Slavs) is amazing. Mostly they are young adults who come here to work. I had to ask “Wait a minute. You’re from Eastern Europe. How did you decide on Key West?”. The most common answer I get is that either they, or someone they know, worked on a cruise line that had Key West as a port of call. They, like so many others, fell in love with it and, in their case, came here after their contract was over and set themselves up. On the whole, they’re a great group of people.
We also have a large amount of Haitian emigrants here. Hearing their patois is common, especially in the stores in New Town.
So, here we have Native Conchs, Americans like myself, who adopted Key West as their home, Cubans who have immigrated here, or generations from their great, great grandparents who did, Bahamians, Haitians, plus all of these aforementioned Eastern Europeans who speak a myriad of tongues, though related, not conversable. How do we all communicate with each other?
It’s very simple: Everyone in Key West, no matter where they are from, speaks English.
I recall once I was walking on Palm Avenue, by the Garrison Bight Bridge and an Audi slowed down with a man hanging out the window, with only his legs still in the car. They pulled over, but never stopped as he asked me some sort of directions in Spanish. I understand a little Spanish, however his words came out as fast as a 50 caliber machine gun and I didn’t understand him. He was in his early thirties, so I answered in English, “What are you looking for?” He got a discussed look on his face and said “No Espanol???!!!” ( You don’t speak Spanish?) . He slammed the side of the car in frustration with a contorted face and swore at me in Spanish. It was my guess that I wasn’t the first person that didn’t speak Spanish that they ran into in Key West. The driver sped off, as his window hanging partner gave me the finger, while hollering that my mother was a whore in Spanish, and took a left on N. Roosevelt and roared away. It was my guess that they were trying to find their way back to Miami. I empathized with them in a way. Here they were, right in between Miami and Havana. It’s a geographic common sense that Spanish would be spoken everywhere. Additionally, it’s very first name, Cayo Hueso (Bone Key), is Spanish. So it’s kind of an odd anomaly, from a geographic stand point, that English is the language in Key West.

But, no matter where you go in Key West, no matter where they are from on the planet, everyone speaks English.

Suggestions for Visiting In Key West

SUGGESTIONS FOR VISITING IN KEY WEST

This is certainly not the end all, spoken from the oracle, by any means, just off the top of my head, at the moment. Having issued that disclaimer, these are worthy of attention, I feel. No doubt, I’ll forget a bunch, but I can always stuff them into subsequent blogs. Hope you enjoy and hope it helps!
GETTING AROUND KEY WEST:
Believe me, the very last thing you want to do in Key West in order to get around, is drive your car. Parking just flat out sucks, to begin with. If you don’t take this advice, trust me, you will agree you were a phucking idiot for having not heeded the warning.
No one would argue that Key West is one of the most beautiful towns in North America, and perhaps the world. There are more homes from the 1800’s here, than anywhere else in Florida, for instance. Additionally, there are so many historical points of interest, sometimes you don’t know where to start. With that in mind, far and away the best way to see this island is on foot. Yes. On Foot. On foot, you miss the least and when you do see something of interest, you stop. You don’t put the brakes on, slow down, and turn around and go back. You just plain stop and take it in, plain and simple. With obesity on the rise and so many of us are just a bunch of lazy blobs(myself included), walking from point A to point B is a cultural change, but trust me on this, it’s the best way. And if you’re in a rush to get everywhere you want to go, you should have gone to Los Angeles for your vacation. This is an island and it’s laid back.
If walking just plain doesn’t work for you, the next best option is by bicycle. Lots of places around town rent bikes too and the rates are quite reasonable. Ten – twelve bucks a day, is the norm. Biking is great in this town as well. I will stick my neck out and say that we’re one of the largest biking communities on a percentage basis, in both the U.S. and the Conch Republic. I can safely say that I have never had an issue parking my bike here, regardless of event, even Fantasy Fest. It’s 100% environmentally friendly and great exorcise at the same time. Welcome to the island and hop on a bike!
Electric cars are somewhat popular and they have virtually no impact on the environment here. Available in 4,6, and 8 seats, they are quiet and efficient. Like cars, parking is a pain in the ass, though perhaps a bit less, as you will be able to park electric cars in spots that cars just cannot. For instance, I’ve often seen electric cars parked on Lazy Way at Schooner Wharf and they’re not in the way at all.
Scooters are the noisiest, most polluting vehicles on the island. Smokey, noisy, two cycle engines on them, they are usually rented by groups of two or more. A lot of locals have them as well, especially those who live in Mid-Town, or New Town and have to get to work in Old Town. They provide good, economic transportation to work and back. The city of Key West also provides specific parking spaces for scooters as well. The locals ride them every day of their lives. Visitors often have never ridden one before in their lives. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen a tourist wipe out on them. Believe me the tarmac in Key West is just as hard as anywhere else. Injuries will happen. Broken bones and road rash cases will be taken care of at the Key West Hospital. Serious injuries will freight you up to Miami, which have excellent hospitals for dealing with trauma. Often that little extra you didn’t expect for your vacation is the most memorable, such as a few days or weeks in Jackson Memorial Hospital in downtown Miami. It’s a beautiful facility and if you’re conscious, you can admire it as the orderly wheels you about the hospital to get various scans and tests.

CAMERAS:
Do not, I repeat DO NOT leave your motel, bed and breakfast, guest house, wherever you are staying, without a camera, EVER. There will always be loads of things and people to photograph in this town! Bring extra memory chips for your camera as well. Shoot at about 3.5 megs or so. You’re not going to print them and between 3 and 4 megs takes up a lot less room on the chip (a.k.a. =more pictures), as well as your computer when you get back home. I promise you, if you leave without a camera, you’ll be cursing yourself all day long. Likewise, all the pictures you take will be a lifetime’s worth of memories. Simple fact is; Even if you take 900 photographs, you’ll end up wishing you took 1,800. Take the camera and shoot away! And don’t worry about looking like a tourist. I’m a local and I’m always snapping pictures, wherever I go. There’s ALWAYS something new. Three months later, when work’s been trying, just grab a beer, sit back and look at all those pictures you took in Key West and I guarantee one, possibly two things will happen. A) The stress of the day will vanish. B) There’s a good chance you’ll book your next trip down!

More to come in future blogs!!!!